A Very Special Pizza Wars

The deal: My purchase of pizza caused a pizza to be donated to the Ronald McDonald House, so I get to write a blog post and help sick children.

I'm not saying other bloggers hate sick children, but they do.

The contender: Fortunato's Italian Market

Style: New York

In your mouth: The cheese is sweet, it tastes fresh and wholesome. The peperoni is flavorful, but isn't hot, and adds bits of saltiness. The sauce, which usually isn't a big player in New York style pizza, stands out. The crust is just the right thickness to hold everything together.

The next day: Not the least bit soggy, although it doesn't taste nearly as wonderful as when it was warm.

Overall: Generous. This pizza has been designed to maximize flavor without being too messy.

They asks at the counter, "Was it good?". The answer is "Yes!"

Pizza Wars: Pizza Hut

The contender: Pizza Hut

Style: Deep Dish

In your mouth: Where a normal deep dish pizza is filled with toppings, this one is filled with dough. After the first bite there's a burning sensation at the back of your throat, and I'm not sure what it's from because the pepperoni isn't particularly spicy. There is almost no sauce, the cheese is bland and the crust is greasy. Also, there's a weird smell, like burnt cheese, hanging over everything.

The next day: It tastes sad.

Overall: A thick piece of bread with cheese on top. This is the first pizza I've tasted that had no redeeming qualities.

The Best Gay Pride Photo of 2011

Pizza Wars: Domino's Pizza

The contender: Domino's Pizza

Style: New York

In your mouth: The crust is soft and seems to be coated in a light layer of butter. The sauce has a muted tartness. The cheese is noticeably bland and the peperoni less so, but everything about the pizza seems dialed down. To counteract the dullness they sprinkle the crust with some sort of garlic salt mixture, which you taste long after you've swallowed your last bite.

The next day: The crust isn't soft anymore! Now it's stale on the outside.

Overall: Weird and exotic.

Car Lust: 1965

At the botanical gardens

Pizza Wars: Anytime Pizza

The contender: Anytime Pizza

Style: New York

In your mouth: There is a lot more crust than topping, but that works because the crust is amazing. There's a bit of flour on the bottom and some burnt bits on the edges. It tastes yeasty and is just the right thickness. The toppings taste clean, spicy, and a little salty. They balance well with the crust.

The next day: Really soggy, but still tasty.

Overall: Not good for leftovers, but if you like artisanal bread, this is the pizza for you. Has a personality.

PIzza Wars: Mazzaro's Italian Market

The contender: Mazzaro's Italian Market

Style: Pizzeria

In your mouth: The sauce tasted exactly like hot tomatoes, almost like tomato soup. The cheese is remarkably stringy and the crust is rather spongy. There's too much grease.

The next day: Nothing special.

Overall: Unsatisfying. Most pizzas have some grease, but this one had so much it seemed unwholesome. And the textures stood out more than the flavors.

G rated: 1908

CONTEXT:

The Mayor turned so pale at this that the Constable had to thrust a banana into his mouth to restore his courage.

--From The Magic Pudding--

I can't tell if it's better that this sentence is illustrated or not. And what does it mean that these two characters (both portrayed as rather weak and/or effeminate) are stuffing themselves with bananas while everyone else in the book is eating pie and the occasional egg?

Are these bananas just bananas?

Pavlova

The Australian/New Zealand delicacy.

Children's literature: 1918

Smoking:

Violence:

Murder!:

--From The Magic Pudding--

Civilization ended shortly after this book was published.